"My 'I Saw You'"

Here's to the driver of the AMAZING car I saw today in the U-District... You know who you are.

You were driving the unidentifiable "fast" car and I saw you at the corner of 17th and 45th... You had the wicked "carbon-fiber" hood, the stellar spoiler, and, oh yes, the rims. You had everything planned out and executed.

Well, almost.

What you didn't plan on, was somebody that knows cars by body style seeing you in your unbelievable WIP. (in case you don't have as much street-cred as me, "WIP"--pronounced "whip"-- is an acronym for Work In Progress).

You were driving a Mitsubishi Mirage. Your hood was a no carbon-fiber but rather, the hood to a Honda Civic that you painted black. Most likely spray painted. And your rims? Well, let me tell you about those... they were 13's... and I'm willing to put money on the fact that you got the whole set of them from Les Schwab for under $100.

In your defense. I know that when you saw Fast and the Furious, and Paul Walker's Oscar worthy performance, you were probably around thirteen years old and the movie impacted you. Something moved inside you.

But here's the dirty little secret. 13'' rims don't make your car fast. A black hood doesn't make your car fast. A spoiler won't, in any way, have any affect in keeping your car from flying off the ground. Stripping all of the identifying marks off your car doesn't make it any more "legit."

The fact of the matter still remains. You still drive a Mitsubishi Mirage.

Embrace this. Let it be. Don't try to change the fact. You're still just as cool as you were before you had your drivers license.

The next time you get into your car and think "what else could I do to make my car more ostentatious and embarassing?" Ask yourself this question, "is this where I want to be when Jesus comes home?"